dispatches from quilt city

Queen for a Day

One of my LexisNexis purchases (see below) was a book called No One Cares What You Had for Lunch: 100 Ideas for your blog. I thought it might be interesting to expand the subject area of this blog beyond food, travel, and how cute Maggie is. The author's first idea is what you would change about the world if you were Queen for a Day?

And can I just say - I've been waiting a LONG time for someone to ask me that question. ;)

First, people would stop chewing their fingernails in public...scratch that, people would stop chewing their fingernails period. You know why? Because it's disgusting. It's disgusting to do and it is certainly disgusting to watch. I hate watching someone stick their nasty fingers in their mouth then shove it in either further because clearly they've already chewed that nail down to almost nothing. YUCK!

Second, people would stop bossing other grown-ass adults on the metro. Look, mass transit can get ugly and sometimes people don't act like the upright walking homosapiens they are and that sucks. However, you screaming at people to "Walk faster - people are trying to get on!" or "People would do well to remember their bags are an extension of themselves!" is NOT HELPING ANYTHING.

Third, men would stop with the street harassment. I'm glad you think I have a fine ass. Really I am - I'll be able to look myself in the mirror now that you have officially solved all my insecurities. But just the same - keep it to your dang self. It's insulting and scary and just plain rude.

Also, if I was queen for day, everyone would wear lovely, flattering clothes and the planet would be stricken of capri pants, ill-fitting bras, and graphic T's. I would never have to wait in line and it would be Free for the Queen day at Nordstrom and Cityzen. Oh and Oprah would be my Lady in Waiting! ;)